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This Week in Hammer’s History

Re-living some special League Cup memories from the week 28 November to 4 December.

This Week Hammers HistoryThis week we are going to gloss over a 7-0 defeat at Hillsborough by Sheffield Wednesday in 1959 and a 5-2 reverse at Tranmere in 1992 to focus our attention on famous League Cup exploits that have taken place between 28 November and 4 December in Hammer’s history.  It’s your own cut out and keep League Cup supplement.

The 1980/81 season was one of the most memorable and successful ever for the Hammers.  Although consigned to the second division at the time West Ham boasted a top flight team and were well on course for promotion when they came up against Tottenham in a quarter final tie on a frosty evening in early December.  West Ham had won each or their last 13 home games and after a slow start to the match began to get the better of their close neighbours whose lineup included Hoddle, Ardiles and Villa.  With less than 10 minutes left and still scoreless Brooking was put through on goal but his shot was blocked by out-rushing keeper Barry Daines in the Spurs goal.  The ball broke loose to the right hand side of the penalty area where running away from goal David Cross chipped the ball delightfully in at the far post to score his 21st goal of the season.  Cue pandemonium and one more famous victory over the north Londoners.

Parkes, Stewart, Bonds, Martin, Lampard, Holland, Pike, Brooking, Devonshire, Cross, Goddard

On 30 November 1988, second from bottom West Ham entertained high flying current champions Liverpool at Upton Park in a 4th round tie.  It turned out to be another memorable occasion under the floodlights and, in particular, for Paul Ince who scored two first half goals (an excellent volley and a deft header) to set the Hammers on their way.  Liverpool pulled one back from the penalty spot (how else could they beat Allen McKnight) before half time but a bizarre Steve Staunton headed own goal restored West Ham’s two goal advantage.  The scoring was then completed courtesy of a Tony Gale Payet-esque free kick that had been awarded after Nigel Spackman tried to remove Julian Dicks head with his boot.  The Hammers securing an unlikely 4-1 victory on the night.

McKnight, Potts, Dicks, Gale, Martin, Devonshire, Brady, Kelly, Rosenior, Dickens, Ince

On the very same day but 22 years later it was top versus bottom as Manchester United were the visitors to Upton Park for a 5th round tie against Avram Grant’s erratic side.  Manchester United were the holders of the then Carling Cup and came into the match unbeaten in domestic competition that season and off the back of a 7-1 annihilation of Blackburn Rovers the previous weekend.  The match was played in what journalists like to call ‘arctic conditions’ and after some early scares Super Jonny Spector took centre stage to notch a first half brace (the American’s first goals in English football) against his former club.  In the second half two well take goals from Carlton Cole made it a wonderful 4-0 humiliation of Sir Alex Ferguson’s side and leaving Sir Alex even more red in the face than usual through embarrassment and cold.

Green, Faubert, Tomkins (Reid), Upson, Ben Haim, Barrera (Hines), Kovac, Spector,  Boa Morte, Cole (Stanislas), Obinna 

So maybe 30 November is an auspicious date for successful League Cup encounters as we prepare for episode two of the Old Trafford series on Wednesday.  Just bear in mind that West Ham were relegated in both the 1988/89 and 2010/11 seasons.

A more personal memory was one where I failed to observe my unwritten rule of never attending matches with supporters of the opposing team.  This was in November 2000 when I took two work colleagues from Sheffield to watch second division Wednesday play West Ham at Upton Park.  This was the first home game after the sale of Rio to Leeds and featured the debut of cut-price replacement Rigobert Song.  With Di Canio in full flow against his former employers we started as if we were going to murder them but the footballing gods had other ideas and we lost the game 2-1 to prompt much mickey-taking.

This week’s birthdays.

1 December  Francois Ven Der Elst (62)

I Wouldn’t Bet On It 18 – So near and yet ….

Looking to plunder some profit from the visit to Old Trafford.

Fancy A Bet

Last week we had some fun bets on our game at Tottenham (odds as per Paddy Power):

10 points on West Ham to win or draw the game @7/5 (24)
1 point on West Ham to win the game @11/2 (6.5)
1 point on there being two goals or less in the game @Evens (2)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 @16/1 (17)
1 point on West Ham to win 2-0 at 35/1 (36)
1 point on a 1-1 draw @13/2 (7.5)
1 point on West Ham to win 2-1 @18/1 (19)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 and Obiang to score the goal @300-1 (301)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 and Payet to score the goal @100-1 (101)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 and Antonio to score the goal @100-1 (101)
1 point on West Ham to win the game and Obiang to score anytime @70/1 (71)

Total stake = 20 points, reducing our balance to 81.

If the score had stayed the same as it was at half time then our return would have been over 150 points. If the score had stayed the same as it was after 88 minutes then we would have had a return of 49.5 points. The odds on a Tottenham victory after 88 minutes would have been massive. Even if the game had ended 2-2 we would still have shown a profit on the day. But the madness of those last few minutes not only cost us three points, but it cost us what would have been an excellent return on our gamble.

It was not to be – if we had been participating in the in-play market then a late cash-out would have been advisable.

This week we’ll have some fun on our game at Manchester United. We had a good run for our money at Tottenham and will aim for a similar run and hopefully, profit, at Old Trafford.

16 points on West Ham to win or draw the game @13/8 (42)
4 points on West Ham to win the game @13/2 (30)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 @19/1 (20)
1 point on West Ham to win 2-0 at 40/1 (41)
1 point on a 1-1 draw @7/1 (8)
1 point on West Ham to win 2-1 @19/1 (20)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 and Obiang to score the goal @375-1 (376)
1 point on West Ham to win 1-0 and Antonio to score the goal @125-1 (126)
1 point on West Ham to win the game and Obiang to score anytime @75/1 (76)
1 point on HT score 0-0 and West Ham to win 2-1 @80/1 (81)
1 point on HT score 0-0 and West Ham to win 2-0 @100/1 (101)
1 point on HT score 0-0 and West Ham to win 1-0 @25/1 (26)

If we lose the game then we are 30 points down on the day, and our balance will fall to 51 points. If we draw or win the game then we are up on the day. With the right score and goalscorer then our profit could be greater. And in the extremely unlikely event that it is 0-0 at half time, and then Obiang scores and we win the game 1-0, then our return would be 570 points. It’s all a bit of fun and adds interest to the game. I fancy we’ll get something out of the game, even if the bookies don’t think so.

What are the chances?

The Lawro Challenge – Week 11

Our mission to out-predict the BBC pundit predictor.

Lawro Crystal BallTen rounds of games in the Premier League have now been completed. That means we have now predicted the results of 100 matches. Just over a quarter of the season has elapsed, and Lawro has narrowed the gap at the top of the prediction league. Rich and Lawro are currently in the Man City and Arsenal positions, whereas Geoff is imitating Sunderland.

However a lot can happen in the next 280 games, just as it can to the teams in the Premier League, and Geoff has more chance of winning this challenge than Sunderland do of winning the league. But he will need to start making inroads into the points gap before falling too far behind.

In Week 10, Rich scored 5 points, Geoff 4 points, and Lawro had the best total again with 9 points. In this challenge we award one point for a correct result, and a further two points (making three in total) if the score prediction is spot on.

 

Rich

Geoff

Lawro

Total after 9 weeks

75

54

67

Score in week 10

5

4

9

Total after 10 weeks

80

58

76

 

 

 

 

Predictions – Week 11

 

 

 

 

Rich

Geoff

Lawro

SATURDAY

 

 

 

Bournemouth v Sunderland

2-1

 3-1

2-0

Burnley v Palace

1-1

1-2

1-1

Man City v Middlesbrough

 3-0

4-0 

3-0

West Ham v Stoke

2-1

3-1 

1-1

Chelsea v Everton

2-1

2-0 

2-1

SUNDAY

 

 

 

Arsenal v Tottenham

1-1

2-2 

2-0

Hull v Southampton

0-1

0-2 

1-1

Liverpool v Watford

4-1

3-1

3-0

Swansea v Man United

1-1

 0-0

0-2

Leicester v WBA

2-0

1-0 

2-1

Five Things From The Chelsea Bashing

Picking out the gems from a very satisfying night in the EFL Cup against Chelsea.

5 Things WHULoving The Tempo and Mobility

A game in which we were definitely ‘up for it’. Playing again at a high tempo with great movement and incisive passing. In some ways it is easier to play like this when teams come to attack you but that is not really an excuse as to why we have floundered against the weaker teams again this season.  If you look at the performance last night you can believe that we are a match for anyone; far removed from the laboured display (especially in the second half) against lowly Sunderland just a few days ago. When you are passing and moving with pace you will always create chances and there could have been more to add to the the excellent strikes by Kouyate and Fernandes. The interplay between Cresswell, Lanzini and Payet is exceptional at times.  We simply need to play like this more often and more consistently; not just when the big boys come along.

The Peripatetic Michail Antonio

Michail Antonio is becoming Slav’s odd job man; right back, right wing, wing-back and striker. I have heard some question his attitude, that he sulks if not in his favoured position, but I believe that is nonsense. He shows great commitment and spirit wherever he plays but is not equally as effective in each one. Although I don’t think he is an answer to our striking problems it was great to see someone with the strength and movement to give the opposition defence the run around. Poor old John Terry was dragged all over the place. The presence of this type of frontman is so important in the modern game. The static lump of a centre forward has no place at the top level and certainly not when played as a lone striker. Pace and movement as well as an eye for goal are what is required both to score goals and create space for others.

Fan Trouble

It is very unfortunate that the crowd trouble over-shadowed the performance; at least as far as the media were concerned who preferred it as a story to Chelsea being ‘ousted’ from the EFL Cup. I have no insight as to who caused the trouble, the ‘real’ extent of the problem and whether the stadium design contributed in any way towards it. Probably need to get the taxpayer to sort it out for us! Other than that it was a tremendous atmosphere.

Three Men at the Back

It is unusual to see a full bloodied English cup-tie with both teams employing 3 at the back. You might expect the midfield to be super over-crowded but it was an open and free-flowing game. The 3 man backline had worked well (until yesterday) for Chelsea and it is so far so good as far as West Ham are concerned as well. It can and does leave more room to exploit down the flanks but is possibly our best option given current available personnel. I guess Slaven will use the system until it goes wrong but in reality it will be more successful against some opponents than others. At the moment Reid, Kouyate and Ogbonna seem to create a solid partnership and acquitted themselves far better than Old Man Terry and his pals.

Obiang and Fernandes

All of the midfield players did their bit last night but in a situation where supporters have perhaps been generally underwhelmed by the summer transfer business it has been very pleasing to see what Fernandes can offer; he looks a very talented and assured player and not just one for the future. Although Obiang is not a new signing he seems like one due to the limited opportunities he was given last season. He provides much needed solidity in front of the defence and what a strike that was towards the end of the first half. It is difficult to understand why he was trusted so little previously. Similar to playing Antonio at right back (and signing Tore) it is one of Slav’s stranger decisions. Great to see Ayew back in the action as well.

The Lawro Challenge – Week 9

A suspicion of foul play as the predictor battle with Lawro hots up.

Lawro Crystal BallThere is something very humbling in trying to come to terms with the fact that you are a worse forecaster of Premier League results than Lawro.  In fact I am becoming quite suspicious of the current standings to the extent that I believe that my predictions may have been compromised by Russian hackers.  There is still a long way to go but I need to consider whether or not I will accept the results once the counting has finished.

In Week 8, Rich scored seven points, Geoff four points, and Lawro narrowed the gap at the top slightly with eight points.  This week’s predictions are below and show unanimous certainty that the Hammers will be three points better off at the final whistle on Saturday..

 

Rich

Geoff

Lawro

Total after 7 weeks

60

45

50

Score in week 8

7

4

8

Total after 8 weeks

67

49

58

 

 

 

 

Predictions – Week 9

 

 

 

 

Rich

Geoff

Lawro

SATURDAY

 

 

 

Bournemouth v Tottenham

2-2

1-2

1-1

Arsenal v Middlesbrough

3-0

4-0

3-0

Burnley v Everton

1-2

0-1

1-1

Hull v Stoke

1-1

1-2

0-2

Leicester v Crystal Palace

2-1

2-0

2-1

Swansea v Watford

2-1

2-0

1-1

West Ham v Sunderland

3-1

3-0

2-1

Liverpool v WBA

3-0

2-0

3-0

SUNDAY

 

 

 

Man.City v Southampton

2-1

3-1

2-0

Chelsea v Man.Utd.

2-1

0-0

1-1

This Week in Hammer’s History

Shaking down the week 17-23 October in West Ham history.

This Week Hammers HistoryIn the new spirit of optimism that has swept into West Ham since the victory at Palace on Saturday I have decided to ignore any defeats in this week’s review of the week in Hammer’s history. The latest win completed a hat-trick of away victories at Selhurst Park and came almost a year after the previous success where goals from Jenkinson, Payet and Lanzini saw West Ham climb to 4th in the table.

Saturday also brought a welcome clean sheet courtesy of solid defending, some fine Adrian saves and Christian Benteke. The passing years have witnessed several high scoring, clean sheet performances which includes two thrashings of our next opponents, Sunderland. Most know of the 8 goal rout in 1968, famous for Geoff Hurst’s six-goal haul, but there was also a 5-0 victory in a second division clash in 1989 (two from Eamon Dolan). Ironically, Sunderland were promoted through the Play-offs that season despite losing the final when their victors, Swindon Town, were denied promotion due to irregular payments to players. West Ham meanwhile had finished in 7th place.

Other notable wins were a 4-0 European Cup Winner’s Cup second round tie against Poli Timisoara in 1980 and a 3-0 win in a bad tempered affair against Bolton Wanderers in 1997.

Dipping into the 1985/86 season it was during October that the season really started to pick up steam. We went into the month in 13th position with 13 points from 10 games (which is what winning our next two games would give us) and by the end had climbed to 7th following three wins and a draw.

On 19 October 1985 West Ham entertained Aston Villa in front of just 15,034 spectators at the Boleyn Ground. With no football on TV in the early part of the season I am relying on memory and I believe that we went 1-0 down to a Simon Stainrod goal before a brace each from McAvennie and Cottee secured a 4-1 victory. The two prolific front-men had by then scored 19 or the Hammer’s 23 league goals between them and went on to contribute 46 by the end of the campaign.

During the season a total of 9 players went on to start in 38 or more of the 42 league games played. One of these, Alan Dickens, was missing from the lineup against Villa: Parkes, Stewart, Walford, Gale, Martin, Devonshire, Ward, McAvennie, Parris, Cottee, Orr

One game to mention from this week that West Ham didn’t win was the 2-2 draw against Tottenham in 1970; a game that will always hold the record for the highest (official) attendance at the Boleyn Ground of 42,322. (As a teenager back then we would often go two people through the same turnstile click so I was always a little sceptical of the official attendances.)

The 1970 season was not one of the most memorable as we finished one place off of relegation. The match saw the debut of Tommy Taylor who I remembered as playing some nice football while being a little suspect defensively. Hurst and Eustace scored the West Ham goals: Grotier, Bonds, Lampard, Eustace, Taylor, Moore, Ayris, Lindsay, Hurst, Greaves, Dear

Birthdays this week:

18 October   Peter Grotier (66)
21 October   Paul Ince (49)
23 October   Christian Dailly (43)

The Boy Never Quite Made It: Ray Houghton

The One That Got Away Series.

Boy Never Quite Made ItOK, so to suggest that someone who won 2 League Championships, 2 FA Cups, 2 League Cups, played in 2 World Cups and a Euro Finals ‘didn’t quite make it‘ may be something of a stretch. In the context of this series though Ray Houghton is another West Ham academy graduate who, for some reason, never became an established first-team player at the club.

Houghton was not a young player who had just trained with us for a while before being enticed away by another club (John Terry) or a youngster sold as part of a relegation fire sale (Glen Johnson) but was a 20 year old professional who was considered surplus to requirements and made available on a free transfer. Tony Carr has been reported as saying that allowing Houghton to leave on a free “was the biggest transfer blunder he had seen during his years at Upton Park.”

Houghton was born in Glasgow but moved with his family to London as a 10 year old. He joined West Ham’s youth set up and during that time was called up to attend Under 18 training camps by Scotland youth supremo (and future manager) Andy Roxburgh but without being awarded any caps.

In May 1982 Houghton made his one and only appearance for West Ham when he came on as a substitute for George Cowie in an away fixture with Arsenal that West Ham lost 2-0. Cowie was another young Scot who did not make a mark at West Ham and the lineup that day also included another youngster Everard La Ronde who also had a short lived West Ham career. End of season games were often used back then as an opportunity to blood a few young players.

As an aside, West Ham had won the FA Youth Cup in 1981 beating Tottenham over two legs with a 2-1 aggregate score. The West Ham squad for the games of Vaughan, Keith, La Ronde, Reader, Ampofo, McPherson, (Bobby) Barnes, (Paul) Allen, Milton, Burvill, Schiavi, (Alan) Dickens had no place for Houghton who would have been eligible.

Ray HoughtonHoughton was allowed to leave in the summer of 1982 and joined Fulham, then in Division 2, on a free transfer. There is not much written about the circumstances of his leaving and so it is difficult to tell if he was simply a late developer, whether his rejection spurred him on to what he subsequently achieved or whether his style just didn’t suit West Ham . Whatever the case manager John Lyall and the coaching staff did not see any potential that merited a further contract.

Houghton was an instant hit at Craven Cottage and his new manager Malcolm MacDonald allegedly asked Lyall “Do you have any other free transfers like that?” His energetic and all-action style of play was soon noticed and earned him a transfer to First Division Oxford United (where he scored in their 1986 League Cup final win) and then to Liverpool where he is spent the most productive years of his career.

As well as rejection at West Ham, Houghton did not receive a call to represent Scotland, the country of his birth, and eventually agreed to play for Jack Charlton’s Republic of Ireland side.. He earned 73 international caps and is remembered for winning goals against England in the 1988 Euros and against Italy in the 1994 World Cup.

Obviously it is pure conjecture but I wonder what impact Houghton could have made at West Ham from the mid 1980’s onwards as they looked to build on the 1985/86 success?

This Week in Hammer’s History

A trawl through the week 3 – 9 October in Hammer’s history.

This Week Hammers HistoryThe week 3 – 9 October in West Ham history is another that has seen many Football League Cup matches since its inception in the 1960/ 61 season. My perception is that this is a competition that West Ham usually fare badly in and one where we are invariably eliminated on a proverbial damp Tuesday night somewhere up north by a lower league side. It was a surprise, therefore, to see that the week has witnessed far more League Cup successes than failures including a creditable 3-1 away victory over Arsenal in 1966 (Hurst 2, Peters) as well as comfortable wins against the likes of Darlington (1975), Southend (1979), Bristol City (1984), Swansea (1985), Preston (1986), Bradford City (1991), Chesterfield (1993) and Walsall (1994).

That is not to say that there have not been embarrassing exits and these include a straight 2-1 defeat away to Stockport County in 1972 and two legged defeats to Barnsley (1987) and Crewe (1992). Against Barnsley a goalless draw in the away leg was followed by a 2-5 home hammering at home while the Crewe tie saw a goalless home draw followed by an emphatic 2-0 away defeat.

Notable League fixtures have included a 4 goal haul for Vic Keeble in an exciting 6-3 victory over Blackburn Rovers in our first season back in the First Division in 1958 as well as the one and only Steve Potts goal in the 7-1 demolition of Hull in 1990. A victory over Liverpool is always welcome and in 1982 goals from Alvin Martin, Geoff Pike and Sandy Clarke (remember him?) helped the Hammers run out 3-1 winners and climb into second spot in the league.

The 6 October 2013 was the date of the famous Ravel Morrison goal in the surprise 3-0 win at White Hart Lane; what a player we thought we had on that day. Many of us believed going into the game that we would be on the wrong end of a hammering; a team who had yet to score an away goal against a buoyant Tottenham side. A chance to re-live the 3 goals in 13 second half minutes below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZeaEpZYDug

This week’s featured game is from 3 October 1999 where two goals from Paolo Di Canio gave West Ham victory over high flying Arsenal at Upton Park. It was Arsenal who bossed the early stages of the match and went close to opening the scoring on several occasions with Bergkamp, Henry and Suker causing problems for the West Ham defence. On 29 minutes, however, PDC set off on a mazy run from inside his own half. It was not the most elegant of dribbles and there was a touch on pinballing before the ball broke wide to Trevor Sinclair. Sinclair’s initially shot was blocked but his cross broke to Paolo who slotted home to make it 1-0. On 72 minutes Di Canio got on the end of a Paulo Wanchope header, flicked the ball over the head of a confused Martin Keown and fired past Seaman for 2-0.

The two goal advantage didn’t last long, however, as Arsenal pulled one back when Steve Lomas set up Davor Suker (one of the many duds that we subsequently took off Arsenal’s hands) to make it 2-1. The remaining minutes was mostly Arsenal pressure and desperate West Ham defending and, although there was still time for Patrick Viera and Marc-Vivien Foe (RIP) to get sent off for second bookable offences, there were no further goals. Viera’s sending off sparked a mini melee which ended with him pushing and then spitting in the face of Neil Ruddock. A win for the Hammers in front of just over 26,000 supporters saw them end the day in 9th place.

Hislop, Potts, Ruddock, Stimac, Sinclair, Lomas, Lampard, Foe, Moncur (Margas), Di Canio, Wanchope (Kitson).

This time it is not much of a week for Hammer’s birthdays:

3 October Clive Charles (d 2003)
7 October Jermaine Defoe (34)
8 October Paul Hilton (57)
9 October Frank O’Farrell (89)

The Week in Hammer’s History

Picking through the crumbs of comfort for the week 26 September to 2 October.

This Week Hammers HistoryThis week in Hammer’s history begins on 27 September 1997 where a run of 4 straight defeats was brought to end with a fortuitous 2-1 home victory over a Liverpool side including Paul Ince and David James. Both West Ham goals were the result of combination play between John Hartson and Eyal Berkovic who would come together in a less collaborative manner at the training ground later in the year.

Five years and one day later, West Ham secured their first league win of the season with the Paolo Di Canio inspired 3-2 victory over Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. I was tempted to have this as the featured game but the less I think about that Glen Roeder season (the worst football manager ever) the better. You can, however, re-live the match below!

It has been a good week to play Chelsea and on 2 October in consecutive years we managed to stuck the blue flag firmly into the appropriate passage. The very average pre-money-laundering Blues being beaten 1-0 at Upton Park in 1993 (Morley) and 2-1 at Stamford Bridge in 1994 (M Allen, Moncur).

If beating Chelsea has been feature of this week over the years then so has losing to Arsenal including the time that they put 4 past Allen McKnightmare in 1988. There was also a time when a heavy defeat at Goodison Park was never too far away and September 2001 was no exception with a 0-5 reverse for Roeder and the boys. There being no game the following week it allowed the Hammers to work on their defending before the next game; a 7-1 pummeling by Blackburn. Difficult to believe the season ended with a 7th place finish.

For the featured game we return to European Cup Winners Cup and the second leg tie with Castilla. You may recall that due to crowd disturbances at the first game in Madrid, West Ham were forced to play the return behind closed doors. The game was so eerily silent, in front of 262 spectators, that it could have been played at Highbury. Within 30 minutes goals from Pike and Cross brought the tie back to 3-3 on aggregate and before half time the Hammers were ahead through a Paul Goddard strike. There was just the one goal in the second period, a thunderbolt from Castilla’s skipper, Bernal, to level the tie once more at 4-4. Into extra time and a goal in each half by the original Psycho, David Cross, made it 5-1 to West Ham on the night and 6-4 on aggregate.

Parkes, Stewart, Lampard, Bonds, Martin, Devonshire, Holland (Brush), Goddard (Morgan), Cross, Brooking, Pike

Notable West Ham birthday’s this week:

26 September:  Alan Stephenson (72)
Tommy Taylor (65)
27 September:   Me
28 September:   Geoff Pike (60)
30 September:   John Sissions (71)
2 October:           Trevor Brooking (68)
Jack Collison (28)
Ashley Fletcher (21)

WBA 4 v 2 WHU

Desperado, why don’t you come to your senses?

Embed from Getty Images

I watched the events from the Hawthorns unfold via the excellent offering on Sky, Soccer Saturday with the talented Jeff Stelling hosting. Who would have thought that a group of ex-footballers watching TV screens interspersed with goal flashes from around the grounds would make for such entertaining viewing? It works mainly because of the skill of Stelling, whose research and ability to add humour to his very quick statistical recall, makes him for me the most impressive football pundit. Added to the chemistry of the four regular ex-players, Le Tissier, Merson, Thompson and Nicholas, then for me it is as interesting a way to follow football on a Saturday afternoon as I know without actually being at a game.

The BBC have tried it with Final Score, and if I didn’t subscribe to Sky Sports then it would be an OK alternative, as would Five Live on the radio, or the commercial station, Talk Sport. But Soccer Saturday is my choice. I interspersed this with watching my second favourite sport, the Channel 4 horse racing from Newbury and Ayr, which included the Ayr Gold Cup.

Le Tissier was assigned what he termed the “dubious pleasure” of the West Brom v West Ham game last Thursday, and admitted that he thought he’d drawn the short straw, not expecting many goals. He described the first half goals as the game unfolded as “comedy defending”. He was particularly scathing about Masuaku’s high clearance “into the clouds” which ended closer to our goal than when he kicked it, and his inexplicable hand ball giving away the penalty for the first goal. He thought Ogbonna was the chief culprit for the second Baggies goal when he should have put the ball into row Z, and the third goal was poor marking generally with Masuaku totally switched off.

Three down at half-time so I had a quick look at social media to brush up on my knowledge of Anglo-Saxon expletives from some of our cultured followers. Jeff Stelling stated what we have been saying for some time about the nonsense of possession statistics when he confirmed that we had 72% possession in the first half. We were three down in goals though! I went into “clutching at straws mode” and thought back to the week after my birthday in February 2011 when we were three down at half-time at the Hawthorns and fought back to draw the game. And of course the concept of comebacks wasn’t completely alien after last week against Watford, although of course the boot was on the other foot then.

The fourth goal was described as “Sunday morning” or “amateurish” as Albion broke away to score from our corner. To some extent I can understand how it happened as we were going for broke, but just one player staying deeper was all it would have probably taken to prevent the goal. At four down we gave it a go, although Albion decided to take it easy at this stage. A Payet free kick hit the angle of crossbar and upright and only just stayed out, then Antonio scored his fifth goal (remarkably all headers) of the season. Payet was brought down in the penalty area, and with Noble already substituted, Lanzini placed the resultant penalty kick low into the corner to reduce the deficit to 4-2. We didn’t make too many clear cut chances from there; just one more might have induced panic in the Baggies’ defence. Collins had a shot well saved by Foster but that was it.

Four defeats in five games means we have only three points, when I would have hoped for somewhere in the region of 7-9 to ensure we were keeping up with the life in the fast lane. At least I had an evening out to look forward to. We went to see the Illegal Eagles. No, not the Crystal Palace FC tribute team, but the excellent band, who were one of the best tribute acts I’ve ever seen, and would recommend them to anyone who likes the Eagles.

I came home just in time to see us have top billing on Match of the Day for a change, but not for the reasons I would hope for. Matt Le Tissier had painted the picture well in the afternoon, and the game was just as he had described. I can’t tell you why we are defending so poorly and many fans think we are already gone.

But those of you who are old enough may remember 1985-86. That season we had just four points after five games, three of which were at home, and sat seventeenth in the table. Two further draws meant just six points from seven games. Of course we finished in third place, eight points clear of fourth, and only narrowly missed out on being champions. But to do that we went on a run of 12 wins, 6 draws and no defeats prior to Christmas. Then we had another run in the second half of the season where we won 11 games out of 13. I don’t believe we are good enough to emulate those days, but we’re also not as bad as some might say.