Author: Geoff Hopkins

Meet The New Boss, Not The Same As The Old Boss

It’s all change at West Ham in what promises to be a busy summer of rebuilding at the London Stadium. The fun starts with David Moyes farewell in a Hammers versus Hatters showdown.

At last, the moment that many have been waiting for as Moyesball faces the final curtain at the London Stadium. We’ve loved, we’ve laughed and cried. We’ve had our fill (and in the last two seasons) our share of losing. And through it all, we lost the ball, while he stubbornly did it – Moyes way.

When the news of David Moyes departure broke in the week, it was met with the inevitable social media storm of outrage from the usual quarters. Reported as if everyone had found out at the same time, it prompted a volley of charges that the club had treated the manager disgustingly after all that he had achieved during his four and a half years in charge. These claims are predicated on the assumption that those involved were unaware that a search for a new manager was underway. Oblivious to the fact that it had been under discussion months beforehand. If the club were insistent on heading down a ‘head coach’ rather than ‘manager’ route, there was no way Moyes would agree to those terms. A scenario where Tim Steidten was sneaking around in the shadows and doodling “I ♡ J Lo” on the dressing room tactics board is the type of juvenile nonsense that only someone as gullible as Richard Keys could fall for

As I have written on several occasions previously, the history books will show David Moyes time at West Ham in a positive light. That is all the majority of causal observers who take only a passing interest in the club look at when they warn us with great monotony that little old West Ham should be careful what they wish for. Rather than being derided, Hammer’s fans deserve great credit for their insistence that style and eentertainment is more important than grinding out results on a weekly basis.

The whole David Moyes tenure at West Ham has been a time of ambiguity. He didn’t really save us from relegation, did he? He only managed one more point in 19 games than Pellegrini had achieved in the first half of the season. But then the 2020/21 season was arguably the Hammers best ever in the Premier League with a record number of wins and points – and a return to European football. Perhaps nostalgia is getting the better of me but I remember the second half of that campaign as a period of exciting, fast-paced counterattacking football at its best. The following season then started in the same vein but fell away sharply in the new year – after failing to strengthen the squad in the January transfer window – despite a couple of excellent performances in the Europa League against Lyon and Sevilla.

It was January 2022 when the rot had started to set in. Moyesball had been rumbled by other Premier League managers, there was no plan B, and the manager double down on his retreat to caution. The league record since then has shown the return of a lower to mid table side – a lowly average of 1.2 points per game. Despite this gradual decline in league form, the event that will forever represent Moyes time at West Ham is the Europa Conference win. It was a fantastic moment for supporters who had been starved of success for so long. The slow motion memory of Jarrod Bowen runningon to Lucas Paqueta’s pass can never be taken away. It may not have been the most prestigious competition, but it is still silverware. The celebrations in Prague and in east London the following day showed what it meant. For many fans, it was the first ever experience of success.

Progress is a complicated concept at a football club. There have been the highs of two top seven finishes and a trophy in the past four years, but can we honestly see a club that is progressing rather than one that had a few good seasons? Would progress have left us with such a small and ageing squad? Have we seen players arrive at the club and be changed beyond all recognition by progressive coaching methods? Have we witnessed any youngsters from a successful youth setup make it further than bench warming duties?  I think we know the answers.   

Although he will not be officially unveiled until after the end of the current season, the strong assumption is that Julen Lopetegui will start work as West Ham head coach on 1 June. Whether or not he was anybody’s first choice – other than the Boards – he is now the man we need to get behind. He has a huge rebuilding job on his hands if he intends to bring his preferred playing style to the London Stadium. A fair few of the current squad are ill-equipped, either through age, pace or technical ability, to play in a possession based, high press, high backline formation. The close season will be even more interesting to watch than usual as the rebuilding begins and the rumour mills go wild.

Before that, there is a small matter of a Premier League game against relegation threatened Luton. There is much more at stake for the visitors than the few million gained or lost from each league position. I rarely have strong views on who goes down and who stays up but would love to see Luton hang on for a second season. Against all the odds it has been a valiant effort by Rob Edwards’ side. It will be a tough ask tfor them hough. Perhaps they can bring one of their Luton vans with them to help move all the low blocks out of the stadium.

It is difficult to know what level of opposition the Hammes will offer today. The season is effectively over but will they want to put on a show for the departing manager? Will Moyes spring any selection surprises or stick with the tried and tested under-achievers? My one wish is that Jarrod Bowen grabs the goal that finally beats Paolo Di Canio’s record of most West Ham goals in a Premier League season. Good luck, Jarrod!

As for David Moyes? He deserves a respectful farewell but there’s too much negativity for him to be ever considered a West Ham legend. COYI!

David Moyes Farewell Tour Heads To Stamford Bridge

Laughing like children, giving to scammers, rolling like thunder, under the hammers. I guess that’s why they call them the Blues …..

The fat lady has charged up her calculator and has estimated the chances of West Ham qualifying for Europe as slimmer than the bumper book of German humour. The singing is about to start very shortly.

In truth, most of us – those who are not pundits – have known for some time that the European dream is over for the time being. A record of just three wins and 16 points from 16 games in 2024 tells you everything you need to know if you are looking at it objectively. It’s relegation form rather than a storming end to the season. With Chelsea finally waking up and Bournemouth on a roll, even a top half finish is by no means certain.

No-one seems to care much about how events might unfold on the football pitch anyway. The managerial shenanigans are far more entertaining. It is ludicrous to swallow the official line that no final decision has been taken by the Board. They are not going to be sitting around a table on May 19 – following a ritual thrashing by Manchester City – for a performance review and to talk things over: “Under weaknesses, David, you’ve put down chips and deep fried cornetto?” David Moyes is history, and anyone with any sense knows that to be the case. There is no way back for him from here. The only outstanding matter is for the official announcement to be made. Like a killer caught on CCTV, holding a smoking gun, blood on his clothes, and DNA all over the corpse, who just hasn’t heard the jury’s verdict yet.

The news that Tim Steidten has been electronically tagged to prevent him stalking the player;s dressing room is a classic West Ham gaffe. No, it wasn’t a good idea for Tim to turn up at the end of season party dressed as the Grim Reaper but that’s German humour for you.

I find it really puzzling why the Board have decided to stretch uncertainty until the final curtain. It might have made sense while the Europa League campaign was still ongoing, but not now. I don’t see who it benefits, and it must create the most awkward of situations for both Moyes and Steidten. Trying to avoid each other like a divorcing couple still sharing the same house.

The list of potential Moyes replacements gets a little longer by the day. As with transfer speculation we can assume that all but one or two of the links are pure media invention. A few weeks back, I threw in the name of Sebastian Hoenes who I had not seen linked previously. Should that happen, I will claim the credit for breaking the news.

Of all the names so far put forward as serious contenders, Julen Lopetegui is my least favourite – but unfortunately, I have no say in the matter. So, who is it going to be? According to Under The Hammers inside sources, Hansi Flick has been spotted eating jellied eels in Whitechapel, Ruben Amorim has enrolled for an online course in Cockney Rhyming Slang, and Paulo Fonseca has been learning the words to Chim Chim Cher-ee. A lot of positive interest there, then. For what it’s worth, my money is on Fonseca.

As for the weekend’s game at Stamford Bridge it has the makings of another comprehensive battering as our old-timers are given the runaround by a rejuvenated Chelsea youth. There is nothing to suggest the Hammers have the mettle to bounce back from their recent four month atrophy.

It would be nice to think that even at this late stage Moyes would try something different – throw in a youngster or two – but it’s likely to be the usual suspects, ta rademark low block, and Mohammed Kudus marooned on the left wing. The gameplan will be to setup for a draw, which the manager would regard as an exceptional result.

The most positive outcome from the match (other than it being one less match before the end of the season) is the chance for Jarrod Bowen to break Paolo Di Canio’s Premier League scoring record. It would be well deserved.

The Hammer’s recent foray into playing short goal-kicks from the back have been nothing short of comical. In the past, the keeper would just hoof a goal kick long in the hope that Tomas Soucek would head it an opponent. Now it goes from the keeper to Zouma, to Oggy, to Zouma and finally back to the keeper to hoof it long. Excellent progress with a few extra passes to add to the possession stats. I’ve called it comical but the inability to pass, move and make space emphasises how the squad has been assembled to play one way only – Moyesball. Whoever comes in has a job and a half on their hands.

The Hammers hopes of clinging on to a top half finish is likely to come down to results the following weekend when the Hammes host Luton and Bournemouth face Brentford. The other games look like formalities. COYI!

The Game Is Up For David Moyes But Can You Guess What Happens Next?

As the on-pitch action fizzles out like a damp squib, the only east-end plotline of note is who’s next for the West Ham hot-seat?

We know, he knows, we know he knows, and he knows we know he knows. Even his pals in the media have finally caught up. The story now isn’t whether David Moyes leaves West Ham or not, but who will replace him when he does. Will they be embarrassed by their superficial punditry and careful-what-you-wish-for-ery? I doubt it. It does make you wonder what value pundits and co-commentators bring to the game, but I guess their job is to get a reaction, not to offer reasoned analysis.

It would be better for all concerned if the club now came out and confirmed the manager will be departing at the end of his contract. Leaving it up in the air makes no sense. Moyes will continue sniping at questions about his future in post-match interviews and the players will feel able to play with a touch more freedom in the final four games.

For the elimination of any remaining doubt here’s a quick refresher on the downward trajectory of Moyesball since its peak at the end of December 2022. In the 90 (NINETY) league games since then there have been 30 wins and 40 defeats – a sorry win percentage of just 33%. Most recently, we have celebrated victory only three times in the last 15 Premier League fixtures. A manager lauded for his organisation skills and defensive nous has presided over the leakiest defence in the division outside the bottom three. And all of this while playing the dullest, dreariest, drabbest excuse for football known to mankind.

As attention turns to what comes next there are several obvious problem areas. Firstly, the summer will be a busy period of managerial change. Just in the Premier League, Manchester United, Chelsea and Newcastle may all be joining Liverpool in looking for a fresh face and fresh ideas. Any coach with a decent CV will be in heavy demand with swift action required. Secondly, an astute coach might run his finger down the thin and ageing squad list and baulk at the size of the rebuilding job required to make it fit for purpose. And, thirdly, the sceptical (hopefully not cynical) suspicion that the Board are incapable of acting with good sense and vision in appointing a successor.

Journalists and commentators have been busily scouring Wikipedia to ensure there are no shortage of managerial rumours. Roughly they fall into three categories: young up-and-coming continental coaches; older been-round-the-blocks experienced managers; and the comedy candidates – yes, you can even get odds on Steve Cooper, Frank Lampard, Steven Gerrard and Scott Parker.

Many Hammer’s fans are putting a lot of faith in the Board taking heed of Tim Steidten’s wise counsel. For the club to progress it has to adopt a far more enlightened approach to both player and coach/ manager recruitment. Identifying potential instead of signing agent recommendations for established players who are not good enough for the bigger clubs. A long list of expensive flops is testament to the shortcomings of past practice. But Steidten will need all his powers of persuasion. For the West Ham Board, a 39-year-old is more likley to be seen as a new player than a manager. Attitudes have to change with the decision makers, whatever that dynamic is in the current ownership structure..   

Of the names that have been mentioned, Arne Slot and Ruben Amorin generate the most excitement but are sure to have more glamourous suitors – although it’s not out of the question that a club like West Ham could prove a useful stepping stone for them. Thomas Tuchel’s name has been linked since his departure from Bayern was announced and could be viewed as West Ham’s answer to Unai Emery. He is another who may attract the attention of bigger clubs (Manchester United) and there is an underlying concern as to how well those who have managed at the top can adapt to life further down the ladder. On the face of it, the same might be said of early front-runner, Julen Lopetegui. But dig a little deeper and his CV is not particularly impressive. A short, failed stint at Real Madrid and one Europa League win during a two and a half year spell at Sevilla is not much to show as a 59-year-old. He’s a ‘no’ from me!

The remaining suspects who could satisfy the Board’s desire for experience and also fit within our price and feasibility range are Graham Potter, Gary O’Neil and Paulo Fonseca. I have reservations about Potter. For all the intricacies of his football it lacks the explosive element required to turn possession into goals. With O’Neil, I still have him pigeon-holed as a backs-to-the-wall manager. Great work at Bournemouth and Wolves but very much in the counter-attacking mould.

That leaves Fonseca, the only one of the three without Premier League experience. His brand of football is encouraging but can it translate to the English game? In the past he has been linked with moves to Tottenham, Newcastle, and Aston Villa but nothing has ever come of it. Is there a reason?

I have zero inside track on what might happen. I would be happy with Amorin or Fonseca but its not my call. Equally, there may be other names on Tim’s list that are being kept firmly under wraps. Past performance does not guarantee future results but what are the chances of the Board making the right choice. Steve Bruce anyone?

Despite all the intrigue there’s still the matter of a home match against Liverpool at the weekend. The visitor’s title hopes were effectively torpedoed in last night’s Merseyside derby leaving the high hopes of a magnificent Klopp farewell triumph in tatters. The German has chosen a good time to leave Anfield as it has the look of a team on the way down, at least in the short term. Players such as Nunez and Diaz are decent enough, but do not measure up to the departed Firmino and Mane at their peak. A reaction to the Everton defeat should be enough to see them ease past a demoralised West Ham who have the look of a side going through the motions.

Oddly enough, despite an appalling run of performances and results, European qualification is still mathematically possible. Other sides as well as the Hammers seemingly reluctant to take the opportunity for the minor placings. Could events still take an unexpected turn? COYI!

Moyes, The Palace, And Resignation

The exit of David Moyes looks increasingly certain as the season enters its final weeks. The beginning of the end starts with West Ham’s cross town visit to take on struggling Crystal Palace

In the end the Europa League exit we were expecting came at the hands of Bayer Leverkusen at the London Stadium on Thursday night . There was no faulting the effort and commitment of the players or the intensity at which West Ham approached the game, but ultimately old legs and the lack of reinforcements to replace them turned the tide.

The Hammers had the German champions on the ropes for much of the opening hour. Alonso was forced into making three tactical substitutions before the second half was underway as his side looked decidedly rattled. And then at around 65 minutes, West Ham ran out of steam. Unused to playing a high press, the demands began to take its toll. With nothing of note on the bench, the game petered out as a contest and even the consolation of becoming the first side to beat Leverkusen this season was lost.

What might have been if West Ham had taken another of their early chances can only be speculated upon. It would have made matters interesting but added time would have been a huge challenge. And with a referee who was becoming increasingly erratic as the game progressed who knows how many players would have been left on the pitch.

If the manager took the same approach to games as a matter of routine, rather than saving it up for occasional must-win European ties, then the ranks of Moyes Out supporters would be nowhere near as numerous. It has been fascinating to watch the narrative switch in the last few days with the now almost universal acknowledgement that Moyes contract will not be renewed. It is now an open secret which I guess will be spun as a face-saving mutual agreement once the final whistle sounds on May 19. The manager packing his bags with the claim that he had rejected a new deal.

As I have said before, the history books will present Moyes time at West Ham in a positive light. Although it may not be remembered quite as fondly by a good many of those who were there and paying attention. I am not personally sold on the idea that he has done a superb job. There were, of course, highlights – exciting counter-attacking football in the 2020/21 season and the memorable night in Prague – but the multiple flaws cannot be ignored. The dour, safety-first nature of the football; the inferiority complex against top sides; the absence of tactical flexibility; poor in-game management and use of substitutions; the obsession with running with a tiny squad; players played out of position; and the lack of trust in youth. If and when he goes, he will leave the club with the smallest/ oldest squad in the Premier League, and the need for an urgent summer rebuild. And this despite record breaking investment in new players during four years in charge.

 With both manager and player recruitment on the cards, it will make for a double whammy of incoming speculation during the summer months. Clearly, the managerial situation needs to be resolved as the priority, if only to quell fears over some of the unimaginative names being thrown around. Not sure I would be excited by the appointment of Graham Potter but others – Thomas Tuchel, Arne Slot, Kieran McKenna – sound intriguing. The benchmark is not to hire someone who is better than we currently have, but to hire the best man for the job of bringing entertaining football to a second level Premier League club. Another name to throw in the ring is Sebastian Hoeneß who has done an outstanding job at Stuttgart in the shadow of Alonso.

If the pundits are right – unlikely I know – there will be a long line of suitors ready to employ the newly available David Moyes. We will wait to see how well that turns out.

Between now and then, West Ham have the contractual obligation to complete another five Premier League games, starting with today’s fixture against Crystal Palace at Selhurst Park. Theoretically, there is still a target of European qualification for the Hammers, but it is looking to be an increasingly outside bet after last weekend’s loss at home to Fulham. The way I see it is a maximum three or four points from the remaining games with a 9th or 10th placed finish.

Palace pulled off a shock win at Liverpool on Sunday to record only their second win in ten games. It has been a less than spectacular start to his Crystal Palace career for manager Oliver Glasner, who holds a 100% record in games against David Moyes – from his tenure at Eintracht Frankfurt. Glasner has been hampered by injuries to key players and his side still need the comfort of a few more points to push away any thoughts of relegation. They will see today as one of the best opportunities in their run-in for the three points needed to ensure safety. Defensively they look suspect but carry a major attacking threat from the flanks through Eze and Olise. Wharton in the centre of midfield has also looked a genuine prospect.

West Ham have several injury concerns going into the game to add to the usual post-Thursday malaise. Among the doubtful are Alphonse Areola, Konstantinos Mavropanos, Jarrod Bowen, Nayef Aguerd, and someone called Kalvin Phillips. There should, however, be recalls for Lucas Paqueta and Emerson after their midweek suspensions.  It could mean one last run-out for veteran Angelo Ogbonna who strangely always make the backline appear more secure. Otherwise, the lineup is unlikely to feature any surprises.

My head says defeat, my heart says a scrappy draw. That’s how low expectations are. COYI!

After Midweek Europa Disappointment West Ham Can Still Finish The Weekend In The Premier League Top Six

A West Ham win against Fulham would see them leapfrog Newcastle and Manchester United into the Premier League top six. But can they shale off Thursday’s footballing lesson to do so?

If West Ham’s Europa Cup adventure isn’t quite yet dead and buried then it’s on life support in a David Moyes induced coma. Only the spirit of Den Haag from 1976 can now save us in Thursday’s second leg.

The cautious approach to the Leverkusen game was as expected with Moyes opting for a 3-6-1 formation in the absence of Jarrod Bowen and Edson Alvarez. The lack of depth in the squad – by design rather than accident – continues to astonish anyone who has been paying attention. Whose most cunning of all plans was this to face the extreme demands of Premier League and European football with the smallest squad of players known to man. And with a manager who runs the chosen few players into the ground while marginalising those on the bench with the crumbs of ninetieth minute substitutions. No wonder the dinosaurs died out in added time.

After West Ham peaked as an attacking force in the 8th minute – their only shot of the game – it was ten men behind the ball for the remainder of the tie. One should not fault the effort of the players in carrying out the manager’s orders, but it was no surprise that one of the Premier League’s leakiest defences was eventually breached by their all conquering opponents. Leverkusen only needed to get lucky once and by the end had managed it twice. The cowardice of the approach by a side from the continents ‘premier’ league in the quarter final of a cup competition was the true disgrace of the evening. Careful what you wish for, my bahoochie!

Topping off the day’s events were the yellow cards won by Lucas Paqueta and Emerson, who now both miss the second leg. They say the only inevitable things in life are death and taxes, but Paqueta getting booked in that game couldn’t be far behind. It would have been part of Alonso’s plan to needle him, but a mature footballer needs to be able to deal with such provocation. I imagine it was double cachaças all-round on Paqueta Island on Thursday night. I have mentioned before, but I struggle with the idea of Paqueta as a Pep Guardiola player. His maverick, instinctive, flicks and tricks seem at odds with Guardiola’s obsessive attention to control and ball retention. The Old Trafford circus is a far likelier destination for him.

Of immediate interest to West Ham is a return to league football and an encounter with Fulham at the London Stadium. Remarkable that a win would see them climb up to sixth in the table. There is little enthusiasm among the chasing pack to qualify for the Europa Conference, it seems. The only form team are Newcastle who have a new lease of life since being gifted the points by the Hammers two weeks ago. Any more performances like yesterdays from big Ange will see Ryan Mason back in charge at the Lane before you can say “what’s the point of Timo Werner.”

West Ham’s recent league form has stumbled between mediocre and uninspiring, although they did manage to scrape their third victory of 2024 at Wolves last weekend. The first half was as poor a performance as any this season and was only saved by the hosts lack of precision in front of goal. The half time changes (plus Wolves losing Ait-Nouri) changed the complexion of the game completely. Not sure how much credit the manager gets for fixing his own mistakes, but it did show the group can play decent, front-foot football when given the opportunity. Even then the irresistible urge to drop back once in the lead was obvious and it was only thanks to VAR that the three points were preserved.

Jarrod Bowen and Alphonse Areola will again be absent and there are injury concerns reported with Dinos Mavropanos. A wise manager would move Mohammed Kudus to the right and bring in a specialist left sided replacement – Maxwell Cornet or Oliver Scarles (heresy, I know). But we know Moyes will persist with a defensive midfield three of Edson Alvarez, Tomas Soucek, and James Ward-Prowse. Michail Antonio will be left to expend whatever puff he has in the tank until he is replaced by Ben Johnson in the 69th minute.

You may remember years ago the West Ham programme would occasionally publish the unofficial London Championship table. Well, as a treat, this is what it looks like for 2023/24 to date.

A decent effort by the Hammers despite experiencing two of the most humiliating thrashings of the season. The 6-0 home defeat to Arsenal, and the 5-0 surrender at Craven Cottage. Today presents an opportunity for revenge against Marco Silva’s side who have yet to win away in London.

Silva is one of the names occasionally touted around as a potential summer replacement for the Moyesiah. From his record, it is difficult to know what to make of him. He comes across as a passionate, tactically astute manager and a good motivator. His brand of football is attractive and way more courageous than what we have become used to, but his teams appear to perform in fits and starts. A run of good results followed by an equally lengthy slump – or that’s my perception of it. Better than what we’ve got but not necessarily the best we can get.

Fulham have a fully fit squad to call on today with South American trio Palhinha, Willian, and Muniz the players to watch out for. After a slow start, Muniz has hit a rich run of goalscoring form and is the main threat to the Hammers hopes of keeping a first clean sheet in 13 games. Only Sheffield United have won fewer away games than the visitors and their win at Manchester United in February is the only success in the last 15 on the road.

The lack of squad rotation has made the Sunday after the Thursday before a less than rewarding time for West Ham – just two wins from the last eight. I can see that run continuing with a 1-1 draw this afternoon. COYI!

Is There Any Hope For West Ham Against Das Invincibles?

It feels like mission impossible for West Ham as they attempt to do what no other team has done this season and get the better of Bayer Leverkusen. Can they do enough to keep the tie alive in the second leg?

Your mission, West Ham, should you wish to accept it, is to come away from the Bay Arena tonight with the quarter final tie still live. Expectations are set no higher than that. On the face of it, this would have been an uphill task at the best of times. With key players, in Jarrod Bowen and Edson Alvarez missing, the challenge is all the more formidable.

Leverkusen have been a revelation this season – arguably European club football’s team of the season. Unbeaten in 41 matches across all competitions and their sights firmly set on a historic treble. A first ever Bundesliga title is all but done, ending Bayern Munich’s eleven season run as champions – bad luck, Harry! A German Cup Final appointment at the end of May against second tier strugglers, FC Kaiserslautern, should be a formality. And then there is the Europa League where they stand as second favourites behind Liverpool.

For the Hammers, it is a game where the pragmatism of Moyesball may well have a valid place, at least in theory. In reality, the approach doesn’t have the greatest track record on its travels against the very top teams. And in all honesty, there have been very few stand-out defensive displays – and even fewer clean sheets – from David Moyes team over the past couple of seasons.

There is little comfort to be taken from claims that West Ham are now seasoned Euro campaigners who have a record of showing up in big games. If teels like clutching at straws. The former might be helpful across a campaign but is tempered by most opponents having hailed from the continent’s second tier leagues; the latter has only been seen on rare occasions. It is not a side with a positive big game mentality. Euro wins against Freiburg and Lyon were exciting but they were games we should be winning. Beating Sevilla was arguably the only true example of overcming the odds.

It is not easy to gauge exactly where Leverkusen would sit in a Premier League context; it is surely top three or four on this year’s evidence. The odds are stacked against the Hammers, especially for an away leg. What is needed is one of those extraordinary resilient displays where the footballing gods, officials, VAR, inspired goalkeeping and poor opposition finishing align to deliver an unexpected miracle.

It will be a fascinating contrast in styles. Moyes set in his ways, rigid formation, narrow defence, low block, ambivalent about possession, hoping for a breakaway or set piece to snatch a goal. Alonso, innovative, focused on flexible roles rather than formations, dominating possession, probing, and with multiple options to breakdown opponents. The threat down the flanks by Frimpong and Grimaldo is a huge danger to a cumbersome backline. It promises to be a long night and it is perhaps appropriate that the city is famous for its pharmaceutical industry – we may all need strong medication by the end of the night.

West Ham have a mixed record against German sides in Europe with six wins, six defeats and one draw. Three of those wins came against Freiburg this season with the others against TSV Munich (1965), FC Magdeburg (1966), and Eintracht Frankfurt (1976). Against that, the Hammers have lost to Eintracht Frankfurt three times, Borussia Dortmund twice, and Freiburg once. This will be a first ever competitive meeting with Leverkusen who themselves have an indifferent record against English clubs – having won just four and lost 12 in 21 attempts.

Moyes has few options to play with from his tiny squad for the game. There must be a good chance that he goes with three at the back in a 3-4-2-1 formation that would match up in a way with the hosts. The issue is that none of the ‘possibles’ to play alongside Kurt Zouma and Dinos at the back has played much football in 2024. Moyes will most likely opt for Aaron Cresswell rather than Nayef Aguerd or Angelo Ogbonna although Aguerd’s pace might represent a more sensible choice.

No question that Emerson plays at left wing-back but it is a toss up on the right between Vladimir Coufal and Ben Johnson. Coufal has been quite flaky in recent weeks. I think Johnson shades it in a wing-back role but guess Moyes will stick with the Czech. By default, the middle of the second row has to be filled by Tomas Soucek and James Ward-Prowse. This a huge worry for me as a pairing – lacking in pace and mobility. The only remaining alternative would be out-of-sorts Kalvin Phillips, but he has, reportedly, not travelled to Germany.

This leaves a front three of Lucas Paqueta, Mohammed Kudus, and Michail Antonio. Plenty of attacking potential but the deeper two may spend most of their time defending leaving Antonio isolated. It is possible that Leverkusen will find Antonio’s muscle hard to handle but he rarely has 90 minutes in him these days.

Leverkusen did have a scare in the Europa League Round of 16 when they went two goals down at home in the second leg to Qarabag. The game followed a 2-2 draw in Azerbaijan. They eventually won the game with two goals in added time. Alonso had rotated his squad for that tie but is unlikely to do so against Premier League opposition. Other than that, the hosts have an impressive home record of 19 wins, 2 draws and no defeats in all competitions.

Minimum requirement from tonight is to be no more than a goal down in the tie. Anything worse feels irretrievable against a team so adept at exploiting space. A win or draw would, of course, be incredible – but just seems so improbable. A secondary objective would be for Paqueta and Emerson to avoid the yellow card that would see them miss the second leg. Wirtz from Leverkusen is similarly at risk.

The best suggestion for tonight is a collective appeal to St Jude, the patron saint of desperate situations and lost causes – mixed with a healthy dose of Motes much vaunted resilience. It’s a long shot but it might just work. COYI!

Squad Game – The Challenge: West Ham Players Pushed To Their Limits In Search Of Euro Qualification

David Moyes has slowly painted himself into a corner by relying on just a small, trusted number of his squad. It’s an approach unlikely to sustain both Premier League and Europa League challenges in the coming two weeks.

As another season draws to a close its success (or otherwise) history will judge it on the final outcomes, not in the way they were achieved. As was the case last season, it might have been painful to watch but if there’s something shiny awarded at the end of it, much of the detail will be forgotten. The equivalent of Braveheart winning an Oscar.

With approximately six weeks of the season remaining, there are two obstacles standing between West Ham and failure. There is the ever diminishing possibility that they will claim a European qualification spot through league position, wherever that line is eventually drawn under today’s convoluted rules. And the even remoter possibility, that they make their way to and win the Europa League final in Dublin. Within the next week, the Hammer’s fate on both fronts may be permanently sealed.

Managers will often say they don’t prioritise one competition over another, but we know from past experience that actions speak louder than words. Then there is the unconscious appeal that playing in the later stages of cup competitions will surely have. Intentionally or not, Thursday’s visit to Bayer Leverkusen will be on everyone’s mind prior to today’s Premier League fixture in Wolverhampton.

The demands of an intensive run-in are not helped at West Ham by the small number of players in the squad that the manager is prepared to use and trust. With no squad rotation of note and minimal use of substitutes the consequence is certain players being flogged beyond their limits as the chasing pack look to overtake them. The team bus could even have a bumper sticker on it – Running In – Please Pass.

There was an obvious irony when David Moyes spoke about the difficulty of coping with Edson Alvarez’s suspension due to the club’s small squad size. Completely overlooking that this has been a deliberate strategy of his own making. Pablo Fornals, Said Benrahma, and Thilo Kehrer didn’t go missing in January, they were let go when inadequate playing time finally got to them. They had been alienated in Moyes system of favourites, just as Danny Ings and Maxwell Cornet have been since. The effective size of the squad in the manager’s mind is no more than 13 or 14 players. And the one player that Moyes did elect to sign in January was a defensive midfielder, the same as Alvarez.

It will come as no surprise that West Ham’s use of substitutes is one of lowest in the League. In stats prepared prior to the last international break, they had used an average of 2.79 subs per game. Only Manchester City scored lower at 2.75 – the sole statistic where Moyes can be mentioned in the same breath as Guardiola. In comparison, Brighton used 4.75 subs per game and 13 of 30 clubs exceeded 4.0. Moyes had only used all 5 subs once (in a fit of anger during the heavy defeat at Fulham) and opted for just one change four times – out of the ten times recorded in all Premier League games. The Hammers also had the oldest bench – the players on it that is, not the bench itself – and were last place in both the timing of the first change (67 minutes) and the average time of all substitutions. Over 17% of all West Ham changes happened after the 90th minute.

There was, however, a first in the Tottenham game, when Moyes made no changes at all. Perhaps chastened by his game changing switch at Newcastle, he opted to stick with what he had rather than risk Kalvin Phillips screwing things up again. In some respects, adopting a more defensive and cautious approach against top teams can make sense. After all, it was obvious Tottenham had few ideas on breaking though a low block. It is when the same tactics are employed against Burnley or Bournemouth that it becomes truly frustrating. On the other hand, fans deserve more to get them off their seats in the heat of a local derby under the lights. It’s fine to say you’re happy with taking four points from Tottenham in retrospect, but it can’t be justification or an intentional gameplan.  

I though there were two odd comments from the managers post-match . The first where Postecoglou kept repeating that West Ham are a big side. That’s not really the case, is it? Of the outfield players, only Kurt Zouma, Dinos, and Tomas Soucek are over 6 feet. In fact, it is one of the shortest squads in the league. The second was Moyes claim that his team had played on the front foot. Difficult to see how that stacks up for a side who had only 33% possession. Perhaps he uses a different definition of front foot.

Today, the Hammers meet another side who pooh-pooh the benefits or possession. Despite enjoying slightly more of the ball than West Ham, Wolves fall below West Ham on touches in the opposition area – although both sit in the bottom five for this metric. So, it will be interesting to see who takes control of procedings.

Gary O’Neil has done a fine job in his first season at Wolves. They looked to be in disarray when Lopetegui jumped ship in August, so to be in with a shout for a European place is some achievement. He will again be without Neto and Hwang to face the Hammers but should be able to give starts to Cunha and Dawson. Kilman and Lamina have always impressed when I have watched Wolves and it is side that rarely gives up.   

Typically, there’s little point speculating about how West Ham will line-up. It’s always the usual suspects. But with the Leverkusen game on the horizon, there must be concerns with the wisdom of featuring Zouma and Michail Antonio in both games. Angelo Ogbonna or Nayef Aguerd are options to replace Zouma, and the return of Alvarez may prompt a rejig that sees Antonio rested to the bench.

It seems no team wants to make the running in the battle for the minor European placings. It was all fairly inconclusive over Easter except for Chelsea’s win over Manchester United setting them up for a late charge. Of the other clubs involved, Bournemouth have the best form while both West Ham and Wolves have been consistently inconsistent. If the Hammers lose at Molineux it could see them drop into the bottom half of the table by the end of the current round of matches -having played a game more than the other challengers.

Richard provided an update on the projections of the Bennett supercomputer yesterday which describes what West Ham would need to reach the expected Euro qualification target of 57 points. Now, I know it’s never over until the fat lady sings but with just two league wins in 2024 to their name, a top ten finish only looks possible if Fujitsu can go in and edit the tables once the season is finished.

A 1-1 draw today. COYI!

David Moyes And The Game Changing Substitution Fiasco

If Anthony Gordon falls over in the forest and VAR is not there to check it, is it still a penalty? Moyes fearful retreat at St James Park cost West Ham another valuable three points. Will he fare any better against revenge-seeking, top four hopefuls Tottenham Hotspur on Tuesday night?

They’ve long said he was incapable of making game-changing substitutions. But the Moyesiah proved us all wrong on Saturday when, with the wave of a hand, he transformed unassailable lead into calamitous defeat. A sublime act of tactical sorcery. What other top level coach could have achieved that?

The Hammers had responded well to conceding an early penalty. Smartly taken goals by Michail Antonio and Mohammed Kudus – ably assisted by Lucas Paqueta and Jarrod Bowen respectively – had seen them turn the game around and put them in pole position by the break. When Kudus returned the favour for Bowen to make it 3-1 early in the second half- the most clinical of breakaway goals – it should have been game over.

Newcastle heads had dropped, their defence was in disarray, and injuries woes mounted. The hosts still carried a threat going forward but their brittleness at the back meant that all West Ham needed to do was hold theri nerve. Stayed in control, keep doing what they were doing and they pick off the Geordies at will as they became more and more desperate.

Then on 68 minutes disaster struck. The substitute alarm on Moyes phone sounded – his replacements are always a function of time rather than circumstances – to indicate it was time to take off Antonio. What to do? Antonio had run the Toon defence ragged all afternoon. Causing problems and creating space that the craft of Paqueta, Kudus and Bowen was able to exploit. If Antonio needed resting, then surely it had to be a like a like for change. But the Moyesiah had other ideas – that’s just what they would be expecting us to do, he reasoned.

It would not be Ben Johnson this time, as it was against Aston Villa two weeks earlier at the same stage, but the rusty and accident-prone Kalvin Phillips. It’s hard to imagine any player experiencing a more disastrous run of games for a new club but rather than lambasting his individual contribution, let’s consider the impact that the substitution had on the complexion of the game.

No longer was there a menacing threat to stretch and occupy the defence. No more would gaps be created between defenders and midfield which has caused Newcastle problems all season. What Plan B was supposed to be once Antonio was withdrawn was never obvious. In the absence of a plan Paqueta pushed forward into a role where he doesn’t have the pace and where he was removed from the areas where he can do most damage. West Ham could no longer defend from the front or control midfield and so reverted to type; dropping deep and inviting the opposition to attack. It was a decision driven by the manager’s ingrained fear and caution. A clear indication the initiative was now in the hands of Newcastle. It is Moyes 101 and a ploy which has been repeated throughout the season. Outside the bottom three, only Brentford have a worse defensive record than West Ham. What could possibly go wrong? Following the point given away against Villa, three were now being gifted to Newcastle.

Adding to Moyes incompetence, Newcastle received two other strokes of good fortune. The first was the injury to Almiron – himself an earlier introduced substitute – to be replaced by regular West Ham nemesis, Harvey Barnes. The second was the disgraceful officiating from the combined efforts of Rob Jones (referee) and David Coote (VAR). My own view is that both penalty decisions were wrong. I don’t just mean they were harsh calls – they were a scandalous interpretation of the laws with both ‘offences’ engineered by the actions of Anthony Gordon. Both were cheating – a known characteristic of how Eddie Howe now plays the game – and way outside the spirit of the game. Even if it could be argued that there was no ‘clear and obvious’ reason to reverse the on-field decision for the first, then the same logic should have been applied to the second. There was no reason for VAR to intervene. Officialdom once again going out of its way to spoil the game and big up their part. Of course, Phillips shouldn’t have dallied with his clearance but how was that ever an obvious penalty?

Because it was overshadowed by the penalty calls, there was minimal post-match analysis about an earlier incident where Dan Burn bundled into the back of Kudus. Had Burn not been the last defender I’m certain a foul would have been given – it was never shoulder to shoulder – but Jones took the easy way out to avoid making a red card call.

On Tuesday, West Ham welcome top four chasing Tottenham to the London Stadium for an extravagantly timed 8:15 pm kick-off. With Edson Alvarez still suspended and Phillips shot to pieces, the task of protecting the West Ham rearguard will again fall to the flimsy partnership of Tomas Soucek and James Ward-Prowse. You have to fear the worst against what will be sustained visitor attacks. We are certainly capable of scoring against them but not outscoring them – unless an exceptional local derby spirit is unexpectedly discovered.

The Achilles heal for West Ham is the absence of depth in the squad. There are so few options to choose from that competition for places doesn’t really exist. If the West Ham starting XI is top 7 or 8 quality, the squad depth is the lower end of mid-table. A clear case of mismanagement from the manager and board.

Still, let’s cross our fingers and hope for a miracle anyway. COYI!

High Toon: Are West Ham brave enough to see off injury ravaged Geordies in Saturday’s early kick-off?

Premier League football is back once again as the Hammers face a succession of six season defining games in the next twenty days. It all kicks-off at Newcastle!

Where were we? Football’s all about stop and start these days isn’t. Like waking suddenly and not being sure whether it’s a VAR review you’re waiting for or it’s the middle of another international break. I feel about as confused as David Moyes looks on the sidelines when his team have just gone a goal behind and he is thinking about what game changing substitution to make – “Ben Johnson for Lucas Paqueta, that should do it!”

With all the interruptions we now have, the need for a Recap button like on Netflix is becoming all the more necessary. I always believed Recaps were intended for Americans with short attention spans due to the regularity of commercial breaks. Now I am starting to see the point. Fortunately, we have the clickbait fan-sites to rely on where every story has five or six paragraphs of ‘season recap’ before the big headline reveal at the very end. The one where a reliable journalist provides a major update that should West Ham win the Europa League, then the manager may be offered a new contract. Who knew?

So, at the end of the last episode, West Ham were left hanging on to 7th place in the Premier League and occupying one of the coveted European qualification slots. Except that each of the four teams below would overtake them if they were to win their games in hand. Gripping stuff! There now follows a run of six games in 20 days which will play a large part in determining the season’s outcome and the club’s immediate future. By the end of those matches, the Hammers could still be 7th and in a Europa League semi-final; have slipped down to 11th and bowed out of Europe; or stumbled along somewhere in between. Personally, I am at the lower end of expectations.

The upcoming league fixtures include two of the other teams targeting 7th place – Newcastle and Wolves; one looking for Champions League qualification – Tottenham; and an unpredictable side who are close to the top of the Premier League form table – Fulham. It’s a tough run to juggle around the two-legged Bayer Leverkusen showdown with just a comically thin squad at your disposal – a squad whose numbers were deliberately run down.

The first of the matches is the weekend’s long trip north to Newcastle for the early Saturday midday kick-off. The Geordies recent form has been as indifferent as the Hammers with both teams having taken eight points from their last six matches. The two teams have the worst defensive records in the top ten and the hosts have been riddled with injuries. In theory it is evenly matched.

But we should be well aware by now of the Moyesiah’s mindset. Newcastle are a big club in his eyes, while his Hammers are wee, sleekit, cowrin, tim’rous beasties – prepared to be overawed and uninspired. The only option is to ramp up the low-block setting to maximum and hope for the best. That most other clubs have identified the Geordies defensive weaknesses – the dangerously high line, the space between midfield and defenders, Dan Burn, the reticence of stand-in keeper, Dubravka to sweep outside his box – will likely be lost on Moyes.

What is needed to beat Newcastle is bravery, not caution. For all their defensive frailties, only the top four have outscored them this season, and they have scored in every home league fixture so far. Is a plan built on shutting them out going to work? If we should score first, will the usual tactic of retreating deeper and deeper make any sense? The best laid plans of Moyes and men often go catastrophically wrong.

Not helping the West Ham cause is the enforced absence of Edson Alvarez, serving a two game ban for picking up ten yellow cards. A good effort by Edson who trails only Palhinha of Fulham in the top flight yellow card stakes. In his absence, the onus shifts to the desolate Kalvin Phillips as the only potential active ball-winning force in the centre of midfield. Little chance of either Tomas Soucek or James Ward-Prowse fulfilling that role. Whatever happened to that Flynn Downes?

The other doubt is Mohammed Kudus who pulled out the Ghana squad for their friendlies against Uganda and Nigeria. Hopefully, this was precautionary measure (or because he didn’t fancy it) rather than a real injury. Assuming he is fit it should be the same team that started against Villa other than the Phillips for Alvarez switch. If Kudus is out, then JWP comes in somewhere.

It was good to see Jarrod Bowen put in his best showing yet in an England jersey on Tuesday. It should certainly improved his chances of winning an all-expenses paid summer break to the Euro benches – as long as the German’s haven’t already laid out their towels on it. More importantly, we need Jarrod to get his Premier League scoring boots back on. He remains two goals short of matching Paolo Di Canio’s record of 16 in a season, with only nine matches left to do it in. Bowen has only scored in one league game in 2024, although that was the Brentford hat-trick.

Saturday’s hosts have a long list of injuries. Botman, Joelinton, Pope, Wilson, and Miley are all injured while Tonali is on long term suspendsion. There are also doubts over the fitness of Trippier, Barnes, and Livramento and late tests will be required. The question springs to mind as to whether high rates of injuries are simply bad luck or a reflection of training methods that are far too intensive to sustain for long periods.

I was once quite a fan of Eddie Howe in his Bournemouth days where he did an amazing job in getting them promoted to the Premier League for the first time. But there is something cynical about him – and his henchman Jason Tindall – that is difficult to warm to, despite a positive approach to how the game is played. When Howe is inevitably sacked before Newcastle win any trophies, I hope he doesn’t end up at the London Stadium. Never trust a man whose face is way too small for his head.

In the circumstances this is a winnable game, but only with the right attitude and positive approach. If our forward players are on song they should be able pull Newcastle all over the place. But past performances have seen attacking intent only in short flashes, rarely sustained over 90 minutes. Playing on the front foot from start to finish doesn’t appear to exist in the manager’s toolkit. The Moyesball approach relies heavily on opponents fluffing their lines in front of goal, or man-of-the-match performances from Alphonse Areola and VAR.

West Ham have never won away in an early Saturday kick-off against a team playing in stripes. I can see that run continuing this weekend. Actually, I just made that last bit up but I’m sure Peter Drury will know the answer. A score draw, I think. COYI!  

They Think It’s All Over: Not Until VAR’s Had A Good Look It’s Not

VAR has become a disaster and is spoiling football as a spectacle. Meanwhile, David Moyes lack of courage against Aston Villa ensures that three points are turned into one.

Little did I know when I had a whinge about VAR prior to the Freiburg game that it was possible for matters to become even worse. The idiots at PGMOL have finally lost the plot – clearly and obviously. What was originally conceived as a second pair of eyes to eliminate the most glaring of on-field refereeing errors, has turned into a system that retrospectively searches the slightest reason for a goal to be disallowed.

There is an old saying that ‘what gets measured gets done’ and this is the approach VAR has been allowed to take. Rather than using the technology to fix existing issues they have taken a solution in search of a problem that no-one knew they had. Because most refereeing decisions are subjective anyway the focus has turned to those that are more obvious – fractional offside calls and balls hitting arms – and where CSI Stockley Park will do all it can to find the evidence for you.

Someone should bang the PGMOL’s collective heads together over their interpretations of the offside and handball rules. Let’s not forget that offside was originally introduced to deter goal-hanging. A more practical definition that acknowledges that context, and either only looks at player’s feet or requires a threshold of clear daylight needs to be found.

It would be difficult to imagine that anyone could create a bigger mess with handball even if they tried. The guidance flip-flops from week to week and with different interpretations depending on whether you are attacking or defending. Most of the issues revolve around which at one point was removed as a consideration but is slowly making its way back depending on circumstances. And I have never liked the idea of rules being interpreted differently depending where on the pitch offences occur.

A pet hate of mine s to see defenders adopting the Riverdance pose rather than making an attempt to block an attacker. Of course, there are going to be cases where a defender uses arms to make themselves a bigger target but in any sporting endeavour arms are essential for power and balance. How about an Olympic 100 metre sprint where athletes must keep their hands by their sides? In the same way there have been cases of attackers deliberately playing the ball at a defender’s hands. These are the areas where officials should be directing their judgement. And sorry, but it will be subjective. To aim for objectivity by changing the rules in pursuit of an elusive aim only ends with a sledgehammer to crack a nut.

Ruling a goal out just because the ball struck an arm or hand in the build up is my greatest irritant with the modern game. I’m convinced it was never a pre-VAR area of contention, but iso one that has been one invented solely for the technology. Again, there will be occasions where players intentionally seek to gain advantage by use of the hand but that is also for the officials to determine.

But above and beyond all this micro-analysis of events is the impact VAR is having on the spontaneity of the game. The attraction of football is that is a simple and fast-moving game – something VAR has made immeasurably worse. It is no longer possible to get lost in the moment celebrating a goal when you know it is being subjected to review for the slightest misdemeanour. This weekend it reached peak absurdity by taking almost six minutes to check whether a clear and obvious error had been made.

There is a case for VAR working in the background to check major incidents, but its current scope is not fit for purpose. How much more refreshing it is to watch a Championship game where it doesn’t feature. Its introduction has failed to make the match experience superior for players or supporters. In fact, it is quite the reverse.

Personally, I would like to see VAR suspended at the end of the season until a more suitable implementation and supervision can be proposed. The PGMOL have demonstrated they are not competent to be in control of VAR. Officials should not be the centre of attention in a football match but that is the situation that has been engineered.

The game itself against Aston Villa was classic David Moyes in a microcosm. In the opening half, a well executed high press against the visitor’s defence forced a series of errors that handed the advantage to the Hammers. There was an intensity that picked up from where it left off the previous Thursday. A smart cross from Vladimir Coufal and a brave header from Michail Antonio put West Ham ahead, and the only disappointment at the break was that there was still only one goal in it.

Understandably, Unai Emery made changes at half-time, but it looked like the Hammers had extended their lead early on – until VAR intervened. After that the home side slowly started to retreat and abandon further thought of scoring a second. What had been Moyes instructions during the interval? Emery made more substitutions and now had two attack minded full-backs on the pitch in Cash and Digne. How would Moyes react? Look to exploit that extra space down the flanks and kill the game off, or sit back and invite Villa to attack at will. Sitting back to protect a 1-0 lead has not worked in the past for Moyes’ team, but perhaps it will one day in the future.

We were left in no doubt as to the manager’s mindset when he replaced Antonio with Ben Johnson with the best part of 30 minutes still to play. Possibly the most inexplicable substitution ever and a sure way to undo the good work of the first half. But Moyes instinct is always caution before courage with the low block his safe place when the chips are down. Just like the salmon who has no option but to return to its breeding grounds, caution is programmed into the Moyes DNA and he will never change. That’s why he must go.

A Villa equaliser was inevitable and once they had scored the feeling was that they would go on to win the game. West Ham had little ambition for either attacking or retaining possession by then. So, the late added time flurry where James Ward-Prowse should have scored, and the second VAR incident occurred came as a huge surprise.

We should also mention the performance of shocking Australian referee, Jarred Gillett. This is the guy, remember, who when on VAR duty disallowed the Maxwell Cornet goal against Chelsea. How this drongo keeps getting return gigs shows how thinly the referee gene pool is spread. Awarding a tame foul on the keeper before the disallowed Kudus effort, booking Edson Alvarez for being a victim and no consistency in the application of the ‘delaying the restart’ diktat were the highlights of his ineptitude. Having booked Dinos mere minutes earlier for kicking the ball away, he gave Zaniolo a free pass for a similar offence as it would have meant a second yellow.

International breaks and suspensions now mean Alvarez can enjoy an extended holiday until the Wolves game on April 6. As the only defensive midfield player who actively hunts the ball down, he will be sorely missed. An opportunity for Kalvin Phillips to step up and earn his corn, perhaps. COYI!